There is no harm in being yourself or keeping it real. Sometimes though keeping it real may be just a tad bit too real and all. Sometimes when I hear something very ridiculous or something I can't believe i usually respond with 'Aww Dude' hence the title of this post.
The other day I was riding to Leicester with two of my friends and then we were having a discussion about hot water and how cold it was. The conversation then veered to a level of how we were going to shower because there was no hot water in the building. Three of us decided to give our suggestions. The one who thought he had the brightest idea then goes 'Can't we boil water and then pour it into a bucket and use it'. I reply him very tersely 'There is no bucket in the house'. He then goes 'what about using a pot'. By pot he meant a cooking pot and I looked at him in disbelief and said 'aww dude, i haven't used pot to bath in my life and you want me to use pot in JAND'. Please people how can you use a pot to bath. To make matters worse, the pots in the house were all dirty so to follow his plan was to wash the pots, then pick the chosen bathing pot and then carry it to the shower. I was completely astonished by such a suggestion.
Moving on to a different situation is a very different situation. This boy had a phone bill of 300pounds and decided not to pay/ could not pay for it. So he was using wifi, this means he could only connect in houses that had an Internet router. He then decided to visit his friend and of course there is no wifi on the trains so he couldn't tell whether his friend was home or not albeit the friend is usually at home. He then gets to the door and knocks for ages. The friend was not there and so there was no means of contacting him. This boy had to stoop so low to lean closely to the door of the house to get adequate wifi coverage from the house and contact his friend. His friend then came back and caught him leaning on the door and bbming. The lengths that people go these days to bbm..lol. The eventual outcome was that the boy had to go pay that bill in order to prevent a further stoop like that.
The last scene that I'm going to write about in this post has to do with the club. I have mentioned earlier in other posts that when you go to the club be prepared for the unexpected. I went for a party recently and beforehand it was clearly stated that normal entry was 7pounds and the VIP would be 20pounds. So advance warning was given to everyone. On my way to the cloakroom i saw a geezer walk in with just a single 5pound note hoping to enter. He was even pleading that it was his last cash. I was baffled. That is even lower than the standard entry and it means that he does not intend to have a drink, he is just around to listen to jams and cool off. This is shocking behaviour as far as I'm concerned. When you're super low on chips, please endeavour not to try and take this kind of piss that the aforementioned man did. You will not have cool fun and you will make a nuisance of the clubbing experience.
THE END.lol
I will write whatever comes to mind at anytime that it comes to mind...
Monday 5 December 2011
Sunday 17 July 2011
Aight then B
The Graduation period is always a time of reflection on your time spent in that institution and also time to look forward to what one is going to do in the next stage of their life. Congratulations to anyone graduating in 2011 whether its from Primary school or University or anywhere therein. As I graduate this week, I am part of this 2011 class.I would like to cast my mind back to a couple encounters within the last few weeks and maybe years that definitely have to be considered stoops.
My friend just told me about an episode that occurred when we were still in secondary school. He had a Nike bag that he had bought for use to carry his book and stationery and the likes. During Visiting days, People used to take some of their food from the day such as chocolates, cakes and the likes back to the hostel to eat at a future time although they were seen as contraband. So on this very visiting day, My friend left his bag somewhere and didn't find it again. He scoured every nook and cranny of the large loyola campus. He then decided to check all the boys hostel rooms and saw it one beside a popular seniors bed. He unzipped his bag to make sure that the contents were safe. Lo and behold he saw a 'nylon bag' filled to the brim with garri and also a piece of cake wrapped in some foil paper. Let me reiterate that all food items were contraband and could lead to suspension. So while I heard this story I could only help but ponder whether this boy was willing to risk his status as a student for garri not even chocolates or sweets. Second thing that came to my mind was this strange combination of garri and cake. Could the garri have been the main course and the cake the dessert or vice versa. Those two should not be smuggled together..ever
Another funny story is my friends father. He is on of the funniest people I've met but his stoop shows that everyone old or young, rich or poor are susceptible to stooping. When one wants to cut their nails or trim it, they generally use nail cutters or those with bad habits will use their teeth and bite the excess off. In the case of my friends dad he uses 'Tiger razor blade' to cut his nails and he does it with so much precision that I was almost tempted to try it. This razor blade issue is funny because I hadn't seen him cut his nails but i saw the wrapper on the floor and asked who was using blade and was told he used it to cut his nails. He also christened me with a new name as if I don't have enough names or pseudo names already. I have been called 'kels'. s-kel, kele, somkele, esquel, somkie and more but nothing could prepare me for what he called me. I think he forgot my name for a second and wanted to tell me to run an errand. He then opened his mouth and called me 'kilishi'. I have been called a number of things but I think this name kilishi takes the prize. Not only can my name not be remembered but it is also similar to a hard edible piece of meat.
My friend just told me about an episode that occurred when we were still in secondary school. He had a Nike bag that he had bought for use to carry his book and stationery and the likes. During Visiting days, People used to take some of their food from the day such as chocolates, cakes and the likes back to the hostel to eat at a future time although they were seen as contraband. So on this very visiting day, My friend left his bag somewhere and didn't find it again. He scoured every nook and cranny of the large loyola campus. He then decided to check all the boys hostel rooms and saw it one beside a popular seniors bed. He unzipped his bag to make sure that the contents were safe. Lo and behold he saw a 'nylon bag' filled to the brim with garri and also a piece of cake wrapped in some foil paper. Let me reiterate that all food items were contraband and could lead to suspension. So while I heard this story I could only help but ponder whether this boy was willing to risk his status as a student for garri not even chocolates or sweets. Second thing that came to my mind was this strange combination of garri and cake. Could the garri have been the main course and the cake the dessert or vice versa. Those two should not be smuggled together..ever
Another funny story is my friends father. He is on of the funniest people I've met but his stoop shows that everyone old or young, rich or poor are susceptible to stooping. When one wants to cut their nails or trim it, they generally use nail cutters or those with bad habits will use their teeth and bite the excess off. In the case of my friends dad he uses 'Tiger razor blade' to cut his nails and he does it with so much precision that I was almost tempted to try it. This razor blade issue is funny because I hadn't seen him cut his nails but i saw the wrapper on the floor and asked who was using blade and was told he used it to cut his nails. He also christened me with a new name as if I don't have enough names or pseudo names already. I have been called 'kels'. s-kel, kele, somkele, esquel, somkie and more but nothing could prepare me for what he called me. I think he forgot my name for a second and wanted to tell me to run an errand. He then opened his mouth and called me 'kilishi'. I have been called a number of things but I think this name kilishi takes the prize. Not only can my name not be remembered but it is also similar to a hard edible piece of meat.
Friday 24 June 2011
Stooperstars
I'm back people. I have been in exam mode but now I am don with it so back on the lookout I am. To borrow a coined phrase from my friend the below mentioned people are a few of the people I feel are Stooperstars in their own right.
I'll start of with my friend A. He was broke at some point after the summer because of his sheer negligence.Basically he was going to Nigeria and decided to empty all the money in his account.He forgot that he had some direct debits and so he entered an unplanned overdraft. Lloyds Bank charges about 10pound a day for unplanned overdraft and he was in Nigeria for 2months. It was a heck of a charge when he returned to the country anyway. So after he had paid the charge as well as the phone bill itself he didn't have a lot of money and he had to go back to uni for some reason a resit or something not too sure anymore. He heard through the grapevine that the uni was providing free coach for students from heathrow airport to loughborough. This boy stooped so low to go all the way from canary wharf to heathrow airport first of all on his oyster card and then made the 4 and a half hour journey back to loughborough. This is a total journey time of 6 hours within the same country just because of poverty. Its crazy...
When i was younger, My brother and I were just young stoops. I was chatting with him about some of the crazy stuff we did and its so hilarious i decided to share it. We used to play this thing called counter soccer on the floor of our room. We would cover every aspect of the game. Building stadiums with our Lego blocks, commentating as well as playing, even turning on the AC when it was a winter time match.sigh* We even went as far as making movies with the toys we had. I remember one piggish looking toy that I had back in the day. It was the most over used toy we had even going on to win so many academy awards(yeah we even staged the academy awards). We used it so much that even after the head fell of this damn pig was still acting and still winning these awards. It was acting as Brad Pitt in some 'films' and then as Quasimodo in some, that's versatility.We were young and stoopid really...
On a less personal level I am going to call out Terry G. He is a super talented producer and something fresh in the nigerian music scene but this man is nothing short of a stoop. In his song "akpako master" , he was actually ringing a bell. Yes! a damn secondary school bell. He was just sounding like a ritualist doctor on this one and even has the look to match,. I must say that is a catchy tune. I can imagine him in thew booth saying 'o boy ring that bell again' and then putting down his vocals. The mad man..
AY the comedian is a also a funny man of very little shame. I went for a show of his and this grown as man was jumping up and down in white garments and ringing a bell and acting like a clairvoyant. It was a bit funny but if that was me and i was looking back at the footage i would be super embarrassed.
I'll start of with my friend A. He was broke at some point after the summer because of his sheer negligence.Basically he was going to Nigeria and decided to empty all the money in his account.He forgot that he had some direct debits and so he entered an unplanned overdraft. Lloyds Bank charges about 10pound a day for unplanned overdraft and he was in Nigeria for 2months. It was a heck of a charge when he returned to the country anyway. So after he had paid the charge as well as the phone bill itself he didn't have a lot of money and he had to go back to uni for some reason a resit or something not too sure anymore. He heard through the grapevine that the uni was providing free coach for students from heathrow airport to loughborough. This boy stooped so low to go all the way from canary wharf to heathrow airport first of all on his oyster card and then made the 4 and a half hour journey back to loughborough. This is a total journey time of 6 hours within the same country just because of poverty. Its crazy...
When i was younger, My brother and I were just young stoops. I was chatting with him about some of the crazy stuff we did and its so hilarious i decided to share it. We used to play this thing called counter soccer on the floor of our room. We would cover every aspect of the game. Building stadiums with our Lego blocks, commentating as well as playing, even turning on the AC when it was a winter time match.sigh* We even went as far as making movies with the toys we had. I remember one piggish looking toy that I had back in the day. It was the most over used toy we had even going on to win so many academy awards(yeah we even staged the academy awards). We used it so much that even after the head fell of this damn pig was still acting and still winning these awards. It was acting as Brad Pitt in some 'films' and then as Quasimodo in some, that's versatility.We were young and stoopid really...
On a less personal level I am going to call out Terry G. He is a super talented producer and something fresh in the nigerian music scene but this man is nothing short of a stoop. In his song "akpako master" , he was actually ringing a bell. Yes! a damn secondary school bell. He was just sounding like a ritualist doctor on this one and even has the look to match,. I must say that is a catchy tune. I can imagine him in thew booth saying 'o boy ring that bell again' and then putting down his vocals. The mad man..
AY the comedian is a also a funny man of very little shame. I went for a show of his and this grown as man was jumping up and down in white garments and ringing a bell and acting like a clairvoyant. It was a bit funny but if that was me and i was looking back at the footage i would be super embarrassed.
Tuesday 24 May 2011
GATS
I haven't been able to put up new material because people are watching their back out here in the ends but I have put my nose to the ground to fish out some of those people that are still stooping even with the stoop police(me) blaring their sirens around. For clarification, not everything is a stoop even though I'm guilty of this. One of my friends said I was stooping the other day because I called on the security guard to stop a fight that was going on behind me. I was on a chill that night that's why i didn't want any broken bottles behind me. I didn't stoop and I didn't snitch like he said, I merely alerted her attention(yes her!) to a ruckus in my vicinity.
On a different note, I am all for people being nice to animals and all but some people are defo pushing my buttons. I have a friend who recently adopted two frogs. yes two frogs. He even bought a crib for the damn creatures as well as food for them to be eating when he himself has not guaranteed that he Will have his complete meal rations for the day. He even stooped even lower to name these creatures. Their names are Freddy and Francine, I'm not even sure how he determined one was a girl. If he expected it closely to decide then he is mad. This practice is not new but is usually by girls. Someone I know used to play with frogs when she was younger. She used to wait for it to rain and then stoop so low to enter the swampy areas and then pick up tadpoles and froggy like creatures. She would then put this under her desk when she was in class. It was all good till one day when the frog was fed up of being in hiding under the desk and then lept out into view of her mates. Needless to say she was looked at as a crazy fellow. I always make sure she is indoors when it rains. Please people stick to the normal dog and ps. Cats are not even in my mind because of the numerous Nigerian movies that i watched that had witches who could transform to cats. When i see a black cat I suspect its a witch called imelda or something..
Its very crazy when you know that someone you're calling is not picking up on purpose. I have this friend who when I call him in the morning he never picks up and then calls me back like %hours later saying he was sleeping. This is a damn lie, I know he can see that call and is purposely airing my calls as if I'm a chick blowing up his phone. Even my brother is always airing my calls and then calls me back a week or two later asking whats good. whatever was good, was good two weeks ago i always say to him. In defence of those who do this, they might be busy at that point which is why i caught one of my friends in the toilet without any loo roll. He was so pressed that he burst in there not knowing that he was broke(I.e no paper..lol) and i saw him pacing about tryna think of how he would sort himself out.I ended up going to buy tissue for him but that was an incredible stoop.
Time to get back to revision though, I'll be back when the loughborough massive do what they do best which is Stooping!!!
On a different note, I am all for people being nice to animals and all but some people are defo pushing my buttons. I have a friend who recently adopted two frogs. yes two frogs. He even bought a crib for the damn creatures as well as food for them to be eating when he himself has not guaranteed that he Will have his complete meal rations for the day. He even stooped even lower to name these creatures. Their names are Freddy and Francine, I'm not even sure how he determined one was a girl. If he expected it closely to decide then he is mad. This practice is not new but is usually by girls. Someone I know used to play with frogs when she was younger. She used to wait for it to rain and then stoop so low to enter the swampy areas and then pick up tadpoles and froggy like creatures. She would then put this under her desk when she was in class. It was all good till one day when the frog was fed up of being in hiding under the desk and then lept out into view of her mates. Needless to say she was looked at as a crazy fellow. I always make sure she is indoors when it rains. Please people stick to the normal dog and ps. Cats are not even in my mind because of the numerous Nigerian movies that i watched that had witches who could transform to cats. When i see a black cat I suspect its a witch called imelda or something..
Its very crazy when you know that someone you're calling is not picking up on purpose. I have this friend who when I call him in the morning he never picks up and then calls me back like %hours later saying he was sleeping. This is a damn lie, I know he can see that call and is purposely airing my calls as if I'm a chick blowing up his phone. Even my brother is always airing my calls and then calls me back a week or two later asking whats good. whatever was good, was good two weeks ago i always say to him. In defence of those who do this, they might be busy at that point which is why i caught one of my friends in the toilet without any loo roll. He was so pressed that he burst in there not knowing that he was broke(I.e no paper..lol) and i saw him pacing about tryna think of how he would sort himself out.I ended up going to buy tissue for him but that was an incredible stoop.
Time to get back to revision though, I'll be back when the loughborough massive do what they do best which is Stooping!!!
Monday 9 May 2011
Na so Craze dey start
The recent delay in posts has been due to my seriously packed schedule as i am in final year not that people have not stooped to their usual lows in the past couple of weeks. Stooping happens everyday and once i see it ill be sure to update, apologies anyway.
I was being screamed at by two of my mates about me being crazy and how I don't act in the normal way that people act. I vehemently denied and then accused both of these men of being equally crazy even if not crazy then 'na so craze dey start'.I'll highlight two stories of my friends to expatiate on this point. One day my friend was chilling in his room and then woke up to someone dressed in white and swaying from left to right and with a white clothe over the head. From the body shape you could tell that it was a girl and she was grunting and making other animal sounds. Anyway he woke up from sleep and decked her to pieces. He actually smashed her through the wardrobe and other parts of her body strewn around the room and eventually booting her out the door.I don't know if this is a normal reaction but i'm sure i would have acted different to this drunk babe. ;) . I asked him why he did it and he said he was scared. I make sure not watch scary movies with him as a result of this.
Crazy Story number two may not be too nice for the PETA advocates or the fainthearted. A man tied his dog to my friends postbox at his house because it is next to a popular store. This tiny cute dog was barking around 7am because dogs usually do that. My friend was tossing and turning and could not get back to sleep because of the dogs barks. He got up and headed straight from the bed going to challenge this canine head long. Upon sight of the dog, he kicked the dog of its leash and all the way to the other side of the road. With the owner shouting helplessly at him and promising to report him to animal rights groups in the town.My friend responded by saying if they all brought their dogs, he would kick them out as well. If this is not crazy, then i am absolutely lost for words.
On another note, I saw the ugliest man ever today. Dude was definitely joking around coming out looking like that.IT was a mugshot and he was in jail so i guess he must have committed some serious crime for looking ugg bastard like that. He is the kind of person making some Segun Arinze confident again..
I was being screamed at by two of my mates about me being crazy and how I don't act in the normal way that people act. I vehemently denied and then accused both of these men of being equally crazy even if not crazy then 'na so craze dey start'.I'll highlight two stories of my friends to expatiate on this point. One day my friend was chilling in his room and then woke up to someone dressed in white and swaying from left to right and with a white clothe over the head. From the body shape you could tell that it was a girl and she was grunting and making other animal sounds. Anyway he woke up from sleep and decked her to pieces. He actually smashed her through the wardrobe and other parts of her body strewn around the room and eventually booting her out the door.I don't know if this is a normal reaction but i'm sure i would have acted different to this drunk babe. ;) . I asked him why he did it and he said he was scared. I make sure not watch scary movies with him as a result of this.
Crazy Story number two may not be too nice for the PETA advocates or the fainthearted. A man tied his dog to my friends postbox at his house because it is next to a popular store. This tiny cute dog was barking around 7am because dogs usually do that. My friend was tossing and turning and could not get back to sleep because of the dogs barks. He got up and headed straight from the bed going to challenge this canine head long. Upon sight of the dog, he kicked the dog of its leash and all the way to the other side of the road. With the owner shouting helplessly at him and promising to report him to animal rights groups in the town.My friend responded by saying if they all brought their dogs, he would kick them out as well. If this is not crazy, then i am absolutely lost for words.
On another note, I saw the ugliest man ever today. Dude was definitely joking around coming out looking like that.IT was a mugshot and he was in jail so i guess he must have committed some serious crime for looking ugg bastard like that. He is the kind of person making some Segun Arinze confident again..
Tuesday 26 April 2011
The Worst
I think some of the worst stoops that I recall come from when I was back in secondary school. Trust me, if you went to boarding school, things were really a hustle back in the days. Things like food were high up in the priority list because the school was extremely stingy with their food especially in my first year there. That's why most of us were very skinny back in the days, they used some serious portion control to keep us in check. Although some stubborn ones still found a way to be chubby or fat. This maybe a reason why two boys took it upon themselves to eat several loaves of bread that were for a number of other students. During the Ramadan period, Loyola used to cater for the Muslim students in our school by giving them an earlier breakfast than the other students so that they could fast properly and all. They would set the table up in the night so that in the morning, the students would have no hassle. It was usually at about 4am. Two boys obviously not satisfied by the buns and tea that was for night cap, proceeded to keep awake all night till it was time for the early breakfast. In fact, they woke up earlier because they devised a plan to steal 16loaves of bread. I don't know what hunger came over them but yeah they stooped and stole the 16loaves and ended up getting the beating of their life after leaving the students hungry. One of them didn't eat bread for a while. I'm sure when he saw the loaf he remembered the beat down he suffered because of one of 'its' brothers.
Don't even get me started on visiting days. We were beastly with our requests. Pizza, can drinks, rice, chicken etc. Some people even went as far as being specific. Get me tanta roll from tantalizers, get me this from chocolate royale, get me this from grand square. There were even some days that MacDonald's was available. Bare people scurried all over campus to get a peak of the big mac sandwich. Some parents honoured these request some didn't. By the time I got to SS1, my parents stopped looking at the list. They would just come with a cooler of jollof rice and fish with some ice cream as desert. They said they were tired of running around Abuja picking up things that would land me in the sick bay the next day. It is not necessary to elaborate on the fact that those on detention the next day were made to clean up the toilets in the classroom area.Now I am looking back, I think that eat everything now or die attitude can be classified as a stoop.
Fast forward to 2010 and I am at a party with some of my friends. We came in a rented car while some of my other friends came to Nottingham with taxi and all that. At the end of the night, the five of us that came in a rented car were ready to go home when we were stopped by a mate of mine. He said that all the people he came in a cab with had left and he must follow us because he didn't want to enter a cab on his jays. I was bemused because the car only takes five people, but then he comes up with a stoop low idea to enter the boot. He ended up entering the trunk of the car from Nottingham to Loughborough for the 25minute drive to save his buck. He even went further to show us it wasn't a thing by sleeping. If the police stopped us, I don't know how we would have explained that it was his choice.
On a different note I have a story to deter those who enjoy picking their nose as a hobby. I have a mate who enjoys picking his nose. He enjoys it so much that he doesn't use only one finger. He invites the others to come and join him in there. He ends up using like three or four of his fingers to get a proper pick of the booger. He now has a big lump in there, from years of picking. Moral of this little story is please use a tissue.
Don't even get me started on visiting days. We were beastly with our requests. Pizza, can drinks, rice, chicken etc. Some people even went as far as being specific. Get me tanta roll from tantalizers, get me this from chocolate royale, get me this from grand square. There were even some days that MacDonald's was available. Bare people scurried all over campus to get a peak of the big mac sandwich. Some parents honoured these request some didn't. By the time I got to SS1, my parents stopped looking at the list. They would just come with a cooler of jollof rice and fish with some ice cream as desert. They said they were tired of running around Abuja picking up things that would land me in the sick bay the next day. It is not necessary to elaborate on the fact that those on detention the next day were made to clean up the toilets in the classroom area.Now I am looking back, I think that eat everything now or die attitude can be classified as a stoop.
Fast forward to 2010 and I am at a party with some of my friends. We came in a rented car while some of my other friends came to Nottingham with taxi and all that. At the end of the night, the five of us that came in a rented car were ready to go home when we were stopped by a mate of mine. He said that all the people he came in a cab with had left and he must follow us because he didn't want to enter a cab on his jays. I was bemused because the car only takes five people, but then he comes up with a stoop low idea to enter the boot. He ended up entering the trunk of the car from Nottingham to Loughborough for the 25minute drive to save his buck. He even went further to show us it wasn't a thing by sleeping. If the police stopped us, I don't know how we would have explained that it was his choice.
On a different note I have a story to deter those who enjoy picking their nose as a hobby. I have a mate who enjoys picking his nose. He enjoys it so much that he doesn't use only one finger. He invites the others to come and join him in there. He ends up using like three or four of his fingers to get a proper pick of the booger. He now has a big lump in there, from years of picking. Moral of this little story is please use a tissue.
Monday 18 April 2011
I'm Getting Paper
Nobody can tell me that they have never been in a situation where they are broke or lower in cash than they normally are. Being broke is one of the most annoying situations that you can find yourself in. You keep going to the cash point hoping that your balance,by some miracle, is different from when you checked about five minutes ago. Some times the cash point might even add insult to injury and show account balance 200 and then available balance Nil. This usually happens when you have paid for something that's gone through but the company hasn't taken their money. Its so annoying, why can't they just take the money immediately?Bloody teases!
Anyway, being broke is the number one reason for people stooping low in life. One of the funniest things about some people is that when they are broke, that's when they appreciate their origins and cultures. This is when they start to crave groundnuts, garri, indomie,and the likes. Some people don't necessarily like these things but these are the closest available items to them. They'll say stuff like 'I just really want to soak garri right now'. Mostly a false statement, garri is cheap and available, Pizza hut is a bit out of grasp at that moment. The worst is when you catch somebody 'soaking' garri twice in one day. There is no alibi for this one, your allowance has finished. You can't have that craving twice a day I don't think. People also do some dastard things in the name of preference. One guy once ordered a 'shot' of lemonade in the club, his excuse to the bartender was that he doesn't want that much.yeah right. take the normal half pint of lemonade and waste the rest instead.
You also get people telling all sorts of lies. One of my mates once walked with a girl he fancied from the Union to the town centre in loughborough. Its about a 20minute trek and this particular night was cold. Luckily one of my friends has a ride, so I was driven home along with some mates. Anyway I accosted this boy and said to him ' Why you no use cab yesterday.are you skint?' He goes ' nah man, i just wanted fresh air'. The biggest lie of all ages. That same fresh air can be all up on you when you're in the cab and the windows are wound down. I don't think you get more fresh air just because you are walking a bastard long distance. Anyway to end the Convo, I told him he 'runs' this town. This person also decided to reduce the stoop boundaries by buying a veggie kebab the other day.I'll explain this. He came into mine and I saw him with one of these plastic containers that they put fast food in. When he opened it, I stared in disbelief. It was a Veggie Doner. It was literally lettuce, cucumber, tomatoes and cauliflower in pitta bread. He is not a vegetarian by the way. He just wanted to avoid the main part of the doner which is the meat. I think this doner was about fifty p. To even make it worse, he put chilli sauce on the vegetables.
Being broke is something that you can identify on a person when you first set eyes on them. You can notice someones big head, big nose and also the fact that the person must be broke. There are sometimes you can just tell that one is having it hard from their demeanour especially towards the end of the month. I went to A levels in a town where it doesn't matter if you're broke or not. You walk everywhere, food was given to us, the clubs were free and the drinks were mad cheap. Still some of us found it very possible to be broke.This was where I first noticed that you could identify a broke person. That's the worst kind of 'brokeness' is when you are not spending that much money and still broke. It was bad such that two of my friends found it difficult to get back to London for the half term festivities. One of them had to stay an extra day in school so that they would send him money to come back to London. Needless to say, He didn't set too much p that holiday.
Another bad situation to be broke is when you're in a relationship. Someone told me about this one couple, the boy was going through a rough patch and the girl was also in the same situation. These two used to alternate meals. So if the boy eats breakfast, then the girl will eat lunch and then feign a diet and both of them forfeit dinner.This is a massive stoop if it really occurred though. You should just take a break and then when the allowance drops, get back together. I wouldn't say that relationship is expensive but it definitely hard to have a relationship on a budget.
All in all, being broke is not the ideal situation for anyone but it will happen at some point. I think the key to life is to make being broke as rare an occurrence as possible.
Tuesday 12 April 2011
They Stoop to Conquer
It's funny how people who go to university together tend to have the same mannerisms, speech as well as habits. This is not always true but in loughborough, it is especially exemplified. This is because there is a certain way that majority of those in final year act as well as some of the second year boys who hang together. There is a certain wickedness to ourselves(for clarity, I will join the group) that has gone on right from my first year. You might not call it wickedness but you must therefore class it as stoopidity(I coined that). The reason I say it is because in loughborough, people are battling it out to be the poorest when normally the guys should be flossing to each other and generally being braggarts.
You may not understand what I mean yet so let me paint a picture for you.In London, you see that there is more of a balling mentality because everyone wants to be looked as a boss and everyone wants to be the alpha male. Bottles everywhere, rented cars, exclusive partying et al. In loughborough, no one seeks to be the alpha male. Acting poor is the order of the day. Four boys go to the student Union on campus. They have a swell time while boogieing inside and trying to meet girls. The problem arises when it is time to go home. Person A will first of all make the remark 'ah.I don't have money o'. Person B will also say the same thing. Therefore it is up to C and D to bear the cost. In any other town this will suffice as they will just pay for their other two mates. Not here mate! C and D in the borough will also say they have no money. The four of them would rather walk from campus back to town than contribute the 2pounds each that it will cost and therefore being wicked to themselves.It is cold and its a fifteen minute walk. Don't give me any bollocks about you liking to walk,it is just you not wanting anyone to 'freehouse' on your head.
A freehouse can be described as an inadvertent attempt to get another person to bear your costs or a purposeful means of getting another person to pay for you. Inadvertent freehouse is when you don't have money at the moment and you need someone to help you with an unforeseen cost. The purposeful Freehouse is also known as a stoop. Explain how a friend of mine came to the club with no wallet. Think of all the scenarios possible, that wallet was left home on purpose. You can't think of going to the club and not think of your wallet unless you work in that club. They don't serve free drinks in clubs and the entry is most definitely not free so forgetting that wallet is a purposeful attempt to use another persons head. Avoid being a waste and don't try this damn method again.
I also have another stoop story to tell. so basically this guy was meant to give one of his friends money on a friday as they agreed. So on friday, the friend comes to this debtors house to collect the owed amount. The debtor stoops so low to force himself into the deepest of slumbers so he will not have to pay that money at the moment. It was until the friend left that the debtor decided to wake up from this feigned slumber. It is okay for you to miss the persons call, but for you to render yourself useless all day is most defo a stoop. This debtor faked this sleep for like 4hours no lie because the friend was playing Fifa11 with a mutual friend. This is a real story by the way.
Bottom line is that a stoop does not mean one is poor but just means that one is willing to degrade himself on account of money. The lows that I have encountered in my last few years deserves more than a blog, i should start a full blown website to tackle and eradicate this vice that is engulfing some of my loved ones.lol
You may not understand what I mean yet so let me paint a picture for you.In London, you see that there is more of a balling mentality because everyone wants to be looked as a boss and everyone wants to be the alpha male. Bottles everywhere, rented cars, exclusive partying et al. In loughborough, no one seeks to be the alpha male. Acting poor is the order of the day. Four boys go to the student Union on campus. They have a swell time while boogieing inside and trying to meet girls. The problem arises when it is time to go home. Person A will first of all make the remark 'ah.I don't have money o'. Person B will also say the same thing. Therefore it is up to C and D to bear the cost. In any other town this will suffice as they will just pay for their other two mates. Not here mate! C and D in the borough will also say they have no money. The four of them would rather walk from campus back to town than contribute the 2pounds each that it will cost and therefore being wicked to themselves.It is cold and its a fifteen minute walk. Don't give me any bollocks about you liking to walk,it is just you not wanting anyone to 'freehouse' on your head.
A freehouse can be described as an inadvertent attempt to get another person to bear your costs or a purposeful means of getting another person to pay for you. Inadvertent freehouse is when you don't have money at the moment and you need someone to help you with an unforeseen cost. The purposeful Freehouse is also known as a stoop. Explain how a friend of mine came to the club with no wallet. Think of all the scenarios possible, that wallet was left home on purpose. You can't think of going to the club and not think of your wallet unless you work in that club. They don't serve free drinks in clubs and the entry is most definitely not free so forgetting that wallet is a purposeful attempt to use another persons head. Avoid being a waste and don't try this damn method again.
I also have another stoop story to tell. so basically this guy was meant to give one of his friends money on a friday as they agreed. So on friday, the friend comes to this debtors house to collect the owed amount. The debtor stoops so low to force himself into the deepest of slumbers so he will not have to pay that money at the moment. It was until the friend left that the debtor decided to wake up from this feigned slumber. It is okay for you to miss the persons call, but for you to render yourself useless all day is most defo a stoop. This debtor faked this sleep for like 4hours no lie because the friend was playing Fifa11 with a mutual friend. This is a real story by the way.
Bottom line is that a stoop does not mean one is poor but just means that one is willing to degrade himself on account of money. The lows that I have encountered in my last few years deserves more than a blog, i should start a full blown website to tackle and eradicate this vice that is engulfing some of my loved ones.lol
Friday 8 April 2011
Don't Mouth Off
In the last few days, I have been asked what kind of blog I am running. Well I don't know what to classify it as but I think it should be understood as a light and satirical read when you have some spare time on your hands. In other words, I'm not so sure. Anyway, I just came from the barbers a few hours ago and he had a problem with affects a lot of people but is still so rampant. This man's mouth oozed so bad that I'm sure that was the instrument he used to cut my hair rather than the clipper.
Bad breath is a very heinous crime in my opinion that's why I stay conscious of any change in condition of my mouth because it is hard for anyone to let you know that your mouth is smelling. This is because even when it is said to you politely like 'this guy your mouth is smelling' or 'did you brush your teeth today', it can still feel like you are being slighted. Best way to solve the mess of bad breath is to start with the man in the mirror i.e ensure that you keep your mouth on lock down if you are not confident enough. In most cases when your mouth is smelling is when you want to talk more. The barber is saying to me 'boss, what do you want?Do you want a fade, same height,Mo...' before he completes the sentence I say scrape everything off before he gives me more options and manages to drown my nostrils with the smelliest mouth I have ever smelt. Trust me a sewage disposal truck got nothing on this dude.
The worst kind of bad breath is in the morning when you have just woken up and just stretching lightly. There was once when I was waking up and I tried to talk to one of my friends. As I uttered the first few words, he just gestured to me to hit the sink before any further info is given. This same friend was sleeping one day when his brother decided to alert him on some important information. His brother just opened his mouth and my friend screamed and said 'I can't sleep'. This means that this breath woke his brother up from a realm that he cant go back to anymore. I was laughing my pants off that day still. I am not saying that one should brush his teeth once he wakes up but don't share any opinions till you fulfil this vital task .
Chigurl has already highlighted this point but its still neglected. There are some people out there who are negligent when it comes to brushing their teeth. When I was a young boy, my mum used to beg me to brush my teeth almost to the point of bribing me. It got so bad that i was purposely not brushing. So in my Js1, i will just wake up in the morning, shower and then head straight to the dining hall and drink the tea that they served us. This tea served as my own toothpaste and brush sad times till I was told by a friend that my mouth was not letting her concentrate. The moral of that story is that you should tell your friends if their mouth is not in the right condition. It will help heal the world if you do because it will better help nostrils all over the world to function. I learnt that if you use your finger and touch the tip of your tongue and put it to your mouth, you will get an idea of what your breath smells like.
to borrow a line 'When you wake up in the morning, taiste a paiste so you're journey will never be in vain'
Bad breath is a very heinous crime in my opinion that's why I stay conscious of any change in condition of my mouth because it is hard for anyone to let you know that your mouth is smelling. This is because even when it is said to you politely like 'this guy your mouth is smelling' or 'did you brush your teeth today', it can still feel like you are being slighted. Best way to solve the mess of bad breath is to start with the man in the mirror i.e ensure that you keep your mouth on lock down if you are not confident enough. In most cases when your mouth is smelling is when you want to talk more. The barber is saying to me 'boss, what do you want?Do you want a fade, same height,Mo...' before he completes the sentence I say scrape everything off before he gives me more options and manages to drown my nostrils with the smelliest mouth I have ever smelt. Trust me a sewage disposal truck got nothing on this dude.
The worst kind of bad breath is in the morning when you have just woken up and just stretching lightly. There was once when I was waking up and I tried to talk to one of my friends. As I uttered the first few words, he just gestured to me to hit the sink before any further info is given. This same friend was sleeping one day when his brother decided to alert him on some important information. His brother just opened his mouth and my friend screamed and said 'I can't sleep'. This means that this breath woke his brother up from a realm that he cant go back to anymore. I was laughing my pants off that day still. I am not saying that one should brush his teeth once he wakes up but don't share any opinions till you fulfil this vital task .
Chigurl has already highlighted this point but its still neglected. There are some people out there who are negligent when it comes to brushing their teeth. When I was a young boy, my mum used to beg me to brush my teeth almost to the point of bribing me. It got so bad that i was purposely not brushing. So in my Js1, i will just wake up in the morning, shower and then head straight to the dining hall and drink the tea that they served us. This tea served as my own toothpaste and brush sad times till I was told by a friend that my mouth was not letting her concentrate. The moral of that story is that you should tell your friends if their mouth is not in the right condition. It will help heal the world if you do because it will better help nostrils all over the world to function. I learnt that if you use your finger and touch the tip of your tongue and put it to your mouth, you will get an idea of what your breath smells like.
to borrow a line 'When you wake up in the morning, taiste a paiste so you're journey will never be in vain'
Thursday 7 April 2011
Musical Desires
This new post is inspired by a song I heard last night called motivation by Kelly Rowland ft Lil wayne. I have been feeling like some songs are definitely taking the listener into a different realm and encouraging certain actions. I listen to the lyrics of most of these songs but for some reason Kelly's song defo takes the cake on this one.To kick off the song she says 'oh lover don't you dare slow down, go longer you can last more rounds.Push harder, You're almost there now'. I dont know about you but there is only one thing that she can be talking about. She sure is not talking about a boxing bout and you can even see that she is warning him not to even try and dull her parole. She goes on to sing 'go lover, make mama proud.I dont wanna feel my legs'.Her desires have been laid bare with tha last request of hers. This song will be heard by a lot of minors and it is tantamount to actually telling us a sexual experience of hers. I'm not offended but I feel that music is going down a path where soon the producer will make a beat and all the artiste will do is to moan over the beat so that they can actually get the listener to that 'zone' that they want us to go to.
She is not the only one that uses this technique to sell songs. The one and only trey songz is also guilty of 'sexifying' music. He is just the craziest man out there. Boasting about his prowess, trying to show girls his invention and ensuring that his name is entered into the heads of those who live around him. Is this really what music is about I say? Well music is about heart and If thats all that he is saying then yeah. On a different note if R kelly is the king of this, then keri hilson is the heir apparent. How can R Kelly, being a grown man that he is, pen that track that goes 'baby I just wanna get you pregnant'. How can he write this and it is accepted? Even if he is talking to his wife/girlfriend, is there really any need for us to eavesdrop on the conversation or for us to be made aware of his plan to impregnate his wife.Nuff said. Keri Hilson must be the archetypal warri woman because she does not want to carry last on this issue o. She keeps releasing songs that blow your mind and calling her videos raunchy can never ever suffice.She sings 'tell me how you like it baby, do you want it fast or slow.Because i get so excited , when you're taking of my clothes'. She is defo ensuring that her inner freak indents on the track and truly wears her heart on her sleeve.
I don't have any beef with these musicians as they are very talented but I'm only questioning the direction that music is going to. That is why a pornstar called Brian Pumper can feel like it is okay for him to now become a rapper and he will then rap about what he knows best. I just think that if someone does not come out with 'Death of the too dirty Lyrics' (DOTTD) song, the boundaries of what you can say or what you can't say will continually be pushed. This has even been imbibed in Nigerian music as they too are feeling cocky enough to say whatever the hell they want. Master Flavour N'abania has a hit called Nwa baby. In this song he says 'nwa baby nyem ife gi'. This is ibo for baby girl, give me your thing/stuff. We must all get what he is asking for because it is not for her to give him her lace wrapper or so. Anyway, just like Wayne Rooney on the weekend, these musicians need to realise that their actions and songs are a motivation to a whole generation and will lead to a generation becoming freaks or perverts. If it is not thought about then we will tragically turn into a modern day sodom and gomorrah.
Ps:I didn't mention a thing about vybz kartel and all those dancehall/reggae guys. They are all bathing in the same aquas(to borrow a word from mr obaihiagbon) of lurid songs
She is not the only one that uses this technique to sell songs. The one and only trey songz is also guilty of 'sexifying' music. He is just the craziest man out there. Boasting about his prowess, trying to show girls his invention and ensuring that his name is entered into the heads of those who live around him. Is this really what music is about I say? Well music is about heart and If thats all that he is saying then yeah. On a different note if R kelly is the king of this, then keri hilson is the heir apparent. How can R Kelly, being a grown man that he is, pen that track that goes 'baby I just wanna get you pregnant'. How can he write this and it is accepted? Even if he is talking to his wife/girlfriend, is there really any need for us to eavesdrop on the conversation or for us to be made aware of his plan to impregnate his wife.Nuff said. Keri Hilson must be the archetypal warri woman because she does not want to carry last on this issue o. She keeps releasing songs that blow your mind and calling her videos raunchy can never ever suffice.She sings 'tell me how you like it baby, do you want it fast or slow.Because i get so excited , when you're taking of my clothes'. She is defo ensuring that her inner freak indents on the track and truly wears her heart on her sleeve.
I don't have any beef with these musicians as they are very talented but I'm only questioning the direction that music is going to. That is why a pornstar called Brian Pumper can feel like it is okay for him to now become a rapper and he will then rap about what he knows best. I just think that if someone does not come out with 'Death of the too dirty Lyrics' (DOTTD) song, the boundaries of what you can say or what you can't say will continually be pushed. This has even been imbibed in Nigerian music as they too are feeling cocky enough to say whatever the hell they want. Master Flavour N'abania has a hit called Nwa baby. In this song he says 'nwa baby nyem ife gi'. This is ibo for baby girl, give me your thing/stuff. We must all get what he is asking for because it is not for her to give him her lace wrapper or so. Anyway, just like Wayne Rooney on the weekend, these musicians need to realise that their actions and songs are a motivation to a whole generation and will lead to a generation becoming freaks or perverts. If it is not thought about then we will tragically turn into a modern day sodom and gomorrah.
Ps:I didn't mention a thing about vybz kartel and all those dancehall/reggae guys. They are all bathing in the same aquas(to borrow a word from mr obaihiagbon) of lurid songs
Tuesday 5 April 2011
Friends and Bants
There are many people in the world who like to be alone and do as if they have a great time when they are on their own. I say Nay. This is a lie because when I'm on my own, I didn't have fun. I end up sleeping, or setting 'accums or watching a movie. Maybe most of you do not set accums but the other two things are very popular options when one is alone.Setting accums is betting for those who do not know. So for this reason I have a lot of friends. Whether they are Hi/Bye kind of friends or actual chill out friends doesn't matter because I enjoy company.
My Current crop of friends in my Uni are very interesting. They say alot of dumb stuff as well as stuff that should be used as ones motivational statement. I am constantly laughing because they are ridiculously funny. Anyway Friend J is the funniest person in the world. He is constantly blaspheming when it comes to Christianity as well as asking very deep questions about his natural religion of Islam. For those of you who are sensitive about religion skip the next sentence as these are his opinions not mine(that's my disclaimer). He says that King James must have been smoking a whole lot of weed for him to have compiled the bible.I would like to think he is an atheist but i will settle for agnostic. He also always gives me stories about his family. I was insulting him one day and i was like 'I'll get with your Mum'. A normal response would have been you're mad or don't say that but instead he said and i quote 'so you go stoop so low as to give my mum. aww dude you're nasty'.Enough said about that.lol. He also told me a story of once when they were having a family dinner and his dad cracked a self depreciating joke and everyone laughed at him. The dad was laughing at first but when the laugh became too much he stopped laughing. He said everyone else got the point to stop except his mum who was still loling. And the next action that occurred was a hot slunch(slap and punch at the same time) to his mums face. In fact the slunch was so hot that he broke her plate. I find this so funny. He has so many stories, its hard to have a dull moment when he is there. My sisters find him so funny and are always inviting him over and no its not to give.
Friend A is the weirdest. He has a weird policy that sees him never wearing underwear. I find it weird because only last year he had chartered like 30pairs of boxers from Calvin Klein store only to discard them in favour of a raw approach under his jeans. He is unabashed and unapologetic about this approach. He even says 'The person wey invent boxers dey mad.wetin be the point?'. He is crazy trust me and he comes up with new words and phrases every day. He went out one day and came back to tell me a story about what happened in the club. He was fuming and said to me 'skels, you no go imagine wetin happen. I see this guy for club dey lovey jays one fat bitch.the guy dey mad'. Please interpret for me what lovey jays is and how it has become a verb.lol. He also has a brother who is my friend as well. This boy has been called a hell spit by my friend J. J said that he is so ugly that he is a stone that was rejected from hell. That he was fashioned by the devil himself and spat out to become a circus freak on earth.Excessive exaggeration but funny nevertheless.
These are just two of the crazy bunch that I find myself entangled in. They also find a way to insult those who are not as aesthetically pleasing as others. They say 'wow she ugg' or 'my days he ugg'. There are even different levels of description of an 'ugg person'. If someone is ugly on a small scale level you can just say 'she ugg stupid'. A level above this is to say 'she ugg stupid' but when someones looks are taking piss out of your eyes then that person ugg catastrophic. There is one person i saw the other day on campus. She was so unpleasant that I had to check if it was april fools or halloween or some shiiii.
There are so many more friends that I will profile later but these two are the weirdest. Anyway I know what you want and I got what you need in the meantime. Ai Den B
My Current crop of friends in my Uni are very interesting. They say alot of dumb stuff as well as stuff that should be used as ones motivational statement. I am constantly laughing because they are ridiculously funny. Anyway Friend J is the funniest person in the world. He is constantly blaspheming when it comes to Christianity as well as asking very deep questions about his natural religion of Islam. For those of you who are sensitive about religion skip the next sentence as these are his opinions not mine(that's my disclaimer). He says that King James must have been smoking a whole lot of weed for him to have compiled the bible.I would like to think he is an atheist but i will settle for agnostic. He also always gives me stories about his family. I was insulting him one day and i was like 'I'll get with your Mum'. A normal response would have been you're mad or don't say that but instead he said and i quote 'so you go stoop so low as to give my mum. aww dude you're nasty'.Enough said about that.lol. He also told me a story of once when they were having a family dinner and his dad cracked a self depreciating joke and everyone laughed at him. The dad was laughing at first but when the laugh became too much he stopped laughing. He said everyone else got the point to stop except his mum who was still loling. And the next action that occurred was a hot slunch(slap and punch at the same time) to his mums face. In fact the slunch was so hot that he broke her plate. I find this so funny. He has so many stories, its hard to have a dull moment when he is there. My sisters find him so funny and are always inviting him over and no its not to give.
Friend A is the weirdest. He has a weird policy that sees him never wearing underwear. I find it weird because only last year he had chartered like 30pairs of boxers from Calvin Klein store only to discard them in favour of a raw approach under his jeans. He is unabashed and unapologetic about this approach. He even says 'The person wey invent boxers dey mad.wetin be the point?'. He is crazy trust me and he comes up with new words and phrases every day. He went out one day and came back to tell me a story about what happened in the club. He was fuming and said to me 'skels, you no go imagine wetin happen. I see this guy for club dey lovey jays one fat bitch.the guy dey mad'. Please interpret for me what lovey jays is and how it has become a verb.lol. He also has a brother who is my friend as well. This boy has been called a hell spit by my friend J. J said that he is so ugly that he is a stone that was rejected from hell. That he was fashioned by the devil himself and spat out to become a circus freak on earth.Excessive exaggeration but funny nevertheless.
These are just two of the crazy bunch that I find myself entangled in. They also find a way to insult those who are not as aesthetically pleasing as others. They say 'wow she ugg' or 'my days he ugg'. There are even different levels of description of an 'ugg person'. If someone is ugly on a small scale level you can just say 'she ugg stupid'. A level above this is to say 'she ugg stupid' but when someones looks are taking piss out of your eyes then that person ugg catastrophic. There is one person i saw the other day on campus. She was so unpleasant that I had to check if it was april fools or halloween or some shiiii.
There are so many more friends that I will profile later but these two are the weirdest. Anyway I know what you want and I got what you need in the meantime. Ai Den B
Monday 4 April 2011
Once Upon a Stoop
This is my second attempt at blogging and hopefully this will work out much better than my last attempt. The last blog I attempted was about the hopeful transformation into a muscular stud from an average joe. Unfortunately, that ship sailed as I realised that I didnt have the discipline at that point to match my desires. That blog was too content specific and thats why I have abandoned it in favour of a more general blog where I can write whatever as pertinent to me.
I feel that the title of my blog will be confusing to those who are not too familiar with me, so I will try to explain its meaning. Stoop is obviously an English word that is in the dictionary(feel free to check its meaning, this isnt a vocabulary blog) but it has been coined by some of my friends to mean a very condescending action in which ones human value is lowered. This just means doing something that can be classified as lowly in short a stoop. For better understanding ,I will illustrate with a few true life examples.
In my First year, there was one of my friends who committed what I would term a stoop. This friend of mine comes from a well to do family and as such had a large financial base. Anyway for whatever reason, he ended up being a a bit broke as we were about to embark on a journey to a neighbouring town about ten minutes away. He proceeded to buy a child ticket to our destination which worked out at about 60pence cheaper than the adult one hence why I termed it a stoop or a stoop low. Anyway while on the train, the ticket inspector comes along and checks everyone's tickets noting that this full fledged man was carrying a child ticket. He then proceeded to ask how old this my friend was, and he responded 13. Trust me this dude looks in no way 13. To cut a long story short, my friend ended up lying his way out of the situation and all this was done just to get a cheaper ticket. This is what I call a stoop.
A stoop low can come in different forms and different ways. Another stoop can be when a person came to the bar when I was at a club one time and proceeded to ask for 'water on the rocks'. This is a stoop because he tried to come on an intelligent hype when he was really just trying to save his money. My other example is also from another friend of mine, so as you can tell 'stooping' is never to far away from me. We went to london for a friends dinner and at the end of this dinner, my friend had to pay for something that he had ordered. This coincidentally sparked the end of his money because this item was the same amount as the last bit of money he had for that month. Anyway, we went back to another friends house and he had a train to catch back to loughborough early the next money. He didnt have any money so he decided to 'stoop' and take money from his friends purse(coins if i must add) so he could get the bus to the train station and buy some coffee which would keep him awake till the train came. I found this so funny because he is naturally rich so to get to that kind of low was really funny to me.
This just helps me explain where i got my blog name from. I have a lot more 'stoops' that i will be sharing in due course.lol. Hopefully Ill have the motivation and free time that blogging requires. For now, I gast go and be useful.
I feel that the title of my blog will be confusing to those who are not too familiar with me, so I will try to explain its meaning. Stoop is obviously an English word that is in the dictionary(feel free to check its meaning, this isnt a vocabulary blog) but it has been coined by some of my friends to mean a very condescending action in which ones human value is lowered. This just means doing something that can be classified as lowly in short a stoop. For better understanding ,I will illustrate with a few true life examples.
In my First year, there was one of my friends who committed what I would term a stoop. This friend of mine comes from a well to do family and as such had a large financial base. Anyway for whatever reason, he ended up being a a bit broke as we were about to embark on a journey to a neighbouring town about ten minutes away. He proceeded to buy a child ticket to our destination which worked out at about 60pence cheaper than the adult one hence why I termed it a stoop or a stoop low. Anyway while on the train, the ticket inspector comes along and checks everyone's tickets noting that this full fledged man was carrying a child ticket. He then proceeded to ask how old this my friend was, and he responded 13. Trust me this dude looks in no way 13. To cut a long story short, my friend ended up lying his way out of the situation and all this was done just to get a cheaper ticket. This is what I call a stoop.
A stoop low can come in different forms and different ways. Another stoop can be when a person came to the bar when I was at a club one time and proceeded to ask for 'water on the rocks'. This is a stoop because he tried to come on an intelligent hype when he was really just trying to save his money. My other example is also from another friend of mine, so as you can tell 'stooping' is never to far away from me. We went to london for a friends dinner and at the end of this dinner, my friend had to pay for something that he had ordered. This coincidentally sparked the end of his money because this item was the same amount as the last bit of money he had for that month. Anyway, we went back to another friends house and he had a train to catch back to loughborough early the next money. He didnt have any money so he decided to 'stoop' and take money from his friends purse(coins if i must add) so he could get the bus to the train station and buy some coffee which would keep him awake till the train came. I found this so funny because he is naturally rich so to get to that kind of low was really funny to me.
This just helps me explain where i got my blog name from. I have a lot more 'stoops' that i will be sharing in due course.lol. Hopefully Ill have the motivation and free time that blogging requires. For now, I gast go and be useful.
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